How to make long journeys bearable when your kid hates being in the car
Please, just make the wailing stop!
Mums and dads are acutely attuned to the sound of their baby’s cries. Various scientific studies have proven that when the wailing starts, parents will be impulsively driven to do everything in their power to make it stop.
Which is why it is so nail-bitingly frustrating when your usual techniques to stop the tears (rocking, feeding, cuddling or otherwise distracting) are rendered impossible by the fact that your child is strapped into a carseat and has to remain there for some time.
This isn’t just an issue during the baby stage either. The whining of an older child who wants to be anywhere other than restrained in a carseat, is every bit as excruciating as the sound of nails on a blackboard.
With coronavirus-related travel restrictions meaning more people are choosing staycations involving cross-country road trips, now seems like an opportune moment for us all to share the ways we’ve learned to cope when travelling with kids who hate being in the car.
I hope the following advice will make your next car journey more bearable, not only for your kids - but for you too.
Timing is everything
Multiple parents advised me that travelling in the evening, around your child’s usual bedtime, is a good idea.
“So they sleep through most of the journey and can be popped straight into bed once you reach your destination,” explains Lucille Whiting.
“When mine were small we did all our long journeys at times they would be asleep,” says psychotherapist Ann Hackett.
“If that is not possible take them for a long play or trip to the park [before you set off] so they are shattered and ready to rest.”
But don’t make them too comfy
If you want your kids to sleep through the journey, it may seem like a good idea to wrap them up in snuggly blankets. But this could be a mistake, as one common reason babies and small children cry in the car is because they get overheated. Carseats are tight-fitting and can make them sweaty and uncomfortable, especially in the summer – so dress them in light clothes.
Plan ahead to prevent boredom
The idea of having to be sat in one place, staring at the back of a chair for hours on end isn’t exactly appealing. So make getting in the car a more enticing prospect by giving your child a new toy to look at and switching it up for something different at regular intervals.
I’m not suggesting you buy a new toy for every hour you’re going to be in the car – I mean, you can if you want to, but another option is to squirrel away a few of their toys a couple of weeks before your trip. Then keep them hidden in a bag and present them with one item at a time, to stretch out the entertainment for as long as possible.
The soundtrack of the summer
Gentle Parenting author Sarah Ockwell-Smith recommends buying a white noise or alpha music CD. “Play this on repeat throughout the journey to help to soothe your baby (if the recording makes you feel sleepy wear ear plugs or listen to your own music through headphones),” she advises.
The look of love
Hang a mirror, suggests Elizabeth Pantley, author of Gentle Baby Care. “That way your baby can see you (and you can see your baby) while you are driving. When in her seat, she may think that you’re not there, and just seeing your face will help her feel better.” You can get a LittleLife Car Mirror for £12.99 at John Lewis.
In-flight entertainment
For young babies who aren’t yet able to reach out and find toys they have dropped, it can be a good idea to get a clip on toy arch that can be attached to their carseat like the Mini Moon Arch, £25 at Kidly. Alternatively, you can get activity spirals that attach to the carseat’s handle, like this one by Done By Deer, £32 at La Redoute.
Now is not the moment to feel guilty about screen-time
When I was little, my Walkman was a car journey essential, and I fantasised about being able to have my own entertainment system in the back of the seat in front of me. Well, now kids are lucky enough that my dream can be their reality.
With a tablet keyed up with their favourite programmes and a carseat organiser with a see-through top pocket (you can buy one from John Lewis for £15, or two on Amazon for £13.99), you’re on to a winner.
If, like me, you don’t have an endless supply of data, you’ll just need to prep ahead. Download the CBeebies iPlayer app onto your tablet or phone and you can fill it with episodes of TV shows that can be watched offline. But be warned, the clips only last for a limited time - so only download them the night before your trip, as you don’t want to get into the car only to find they’ve all expired.
Don’t feel guilty, even the NCT recommend a bit of screen-time to make car journeys fun for toddlers.
Little Loves
My toddler was given one of these genius mess-free travel Aqua Doodle drawing pads by his great aunt and great uncle, and now it comes on every long journey with us. For arty fun without the worry of crayon marks all over the car, simply fill up the pen with water and your child can use it to create doodles on the pad. If it runs out of water while you’re on the go, just top it up from your flask.
Can You Help With A Little Thing?
An upcoming issue of The Little Things will focus on how to help kids sleep during a heatwave. Do you have any advice to share? If so, you can let me know by replying to this email. Thank you 😊
Little Lowdown
If you’re in the market for toys for a four-year-old, you may want to check out my latest gift guide on The Strategist UK. I spoke to more than 10 experts (including a play psychologist) to find out what they’d recommend, from the best books to the best outdoor toys.
I never got to grips with putting my baby in a sling, as I just couldn’t get over the fear that he was going to slip out, but if this TikTok video had been around a couple of years ago perhaps I would have mastered it.
Articles listing ideas for games to play with your toddler are often disappointing, as they usually just cover things we all already know, like catch and hopscotch, but this guide by Tara Breathnach on Made For Mums, includes some really inventive ideas such as how to make dinosaur eggs.
'He's become violent and upset': On Yahoo, Caroline Allen has delved into The Babies In Lockdown report, in which new mums have shared heart-wrenching accounts of lockdown's impact on their families.
About Me
I’m Ellen Wallwork, a sleep-deprived mum-of-one, incessant worrier and freelance journalist. I’ve been writing about parenting for more years than I care to remember and previously launched the Parents section on HuffPost UK. Follow me on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram (but be warned, I’m not a prolific poster).
If you enjoyed this newsletter and perhaps learnt something new, please do forward it to your friends or give it a shout out on social media. You could also buy me a virtual coffee through ko-fi, here (caffeinated please, did I mention I'm tired?)
Was this email forwarded to you? Subscribe here.
Picture Credit: Tomy
Disclaimer: This newsletter does not provide medical advice and is not a substitute for professional medical advice. The use of any information contained in this newsletter is solely at your own risk.
Curtains are essential for adding privacy and controlling light and temperature in a room.
They come in various styles, colors, and fabrics to complement any decorated and can be customized to fit different window sizes and shape.